Jellygate, widows and a timed-out cop
Sweets on the pitch and Borde forgets player's names
Kanishkaa Balachandran
06-Aug-2007
 |
|
The bean culprit
Jellygate, the latest scandal to hit cricket, seems to be a headline-writer's delight. Clichés galore have flashed across television screens, and newspapers haven't yet tired of calling it the "Sweetest ... (whatever)". The incident did leave the players fuming, though, but the search for the perpetrator may have hit a dead end. Zaheer Khan's bat-wagging at Kevin Pietersen didn't help, neither did his finger-pointing at Alastair Cook. Matt Prior, the Barmy Army's unofficial mouthpiece on the pitch, couldn't sit quiet for too long and came out with his thesis. He said that a couple of jelly beans may have fallen near the pitch after the drinks break and that none were aimed at the batsman to distract him. Conclusive enough? Unfortunately, the only witness just lay there on the grass without saying a word.
Jellygate, the latest scandal to hit cricket, seems to be a headline-writer's delight. Clichés galore have flashed across television screens, and newspapers haven't yet tired of calling it the "Sweetest ... (whatever)". The incident did leave the players fuming, though, but the search for the perpetrator may have hit a dead end. Zaheer Khan's bat-wagging at Kevin Pietersen didn't help, neither did his finger-pointing at Alastair Cook. Matt Prior, the Barmy Army's unofficial mouthpiece on the pitch, couldn't sit quiet for too long and came out with his thesis. He said that a couple of jelly beans may have fallen near the pitch after the drinks break and that none were aimed at the batsman to distract him. Conclusive enough? Unfortunately, the only witness just lay there on the grass without saying a word.
Timed out while fighting crime
All are equal in the eyes of the law - well, at least the laws of cricket. Law 31 makes no exceptions, as a constable on duty found out recently. Martin Skirving, a player for Seaton Carew, a club in England, was timed out for a duck while on his regular day job miles away in Hartlepool. He had informed the club he would make it to the game as soon as possible, and when he got the shocking news he thought his teammates were taking the mickey out of him. The dismissal not only wrecked his batting average, it cost his side their star batsman, and they went on to lose. If Skirving had zipped to the ground in three minutes flat to beat the timed-out cut-off (no speeding ticket for him, remember), we might just have witnessed what would probably have been the first instance of a cop walking out to bat in uniform. One for the album.
All are equal in the eyes of the law - well, at least the laws of cricket. Law 31 makes no exceptions, as a constable on duty found out recently. Martin Skirving, a player for Seaton Carew, a club in England, was timed out for a duck while on his regular day job miles away in Hartlepool. He had informed the club he would make it to the game as soon as possible, and when he got the shocking news he thought his teammates were taking the mickey out of him. The dismissal not only wrecked his batting average, it cost his side their star batsman, and they went on to lose. If Skirving had zipped to the ground in three minutes flat to beat the timed-out cut-off (no speeding ticket for him, remember), we might just have witnessed what would probably have been the first instance of a cop walking out to bat in uniform. One for the album.
Ladies first
The television crew covering the Scotland-India ODI at Glasgow on August 16 may well end up focusing on the stands more than the cricket. Lloyds TSB Scotland, sponsors of Scottish cricket, announced plans to draw in cricket widows by inviting male supporters to bring their (female) partners along for free (the first 50 at least). The brains behind this marketing strategy hope to spread the gospel of cricket among the ladies. If Henry Blofeld is around, he might just want to take to earring-spotting again.
The television crew covering the Scotland-India ODI at Glasgow on August 16 may well end up focusing on the stands more than the cricket. Lloyds TSB Scotland, sponsors of Scottish cricket, announced plans to draw in cricket widows by inviting male supporters to bring their (female) partners along for free (the first 50 at least). The brains behind this marketing strategy hope to spread the gospel of cricket among the ladies. If Henry Blofeld is around, he might just want to take to earring-spotting again.
Mad Max, Part IV
So what's Aravinda de Silva up to these days? He was last spotted plundering a club side in England. Players of the Wimborne and Colehill club in the Dorset league were in for a rude shock when Aravinda, nicknamed Mad Max in his prime, emerged from a car and smashed an unbeaten 39, which included three fours and a six, guiding his team, Sherborne, to an easy seven-wicket win. One of the players, Steve Page, claimed he had invited his friend Aravinda, and while the rest of his mates refused to believe this at first, they had to when the man in question actually appeared. "His bat seemed three feet wide," a star-struck John Rideout, the Wimborne chairman, was quoted as saying in the English newspapers.
So what's Aravinda de Silva up to these days? He was last spotted plundering a club side in England. Players of the Wimborne and Colehill club in the Dorset league were in for a rude shock when Aravinda, nicknamed Mad Max in his prime, emerged from a car and smashed an unbeaten 39, which included three fours and a six, guiding his team, Sherborne, to an easy seven-wicket win. One of the players, Steve Page, claimed he had invited his friend Aravinda, and while the rest of his mates refused to believe this at first, they had to when the man in question actually appeared. "His bat seemed three feet wide," a star-struck John Rideout, the Wimborne chairman, was quoted as saying in the English newspapers.
Please, for name's sake
Getting players' names right has been a weakness for Chandu Borde in the past. So when he was appointed manager of the Indian team's tour of England, the travelling media rubbed their hands in anticipation of some classic Borde moments. They didn't have long to wait. The Times of India reported that in a team meeting before the second Test at Trent Bridge, Borde referred to a player named Salim. After a pause, when someone asked who Borde was talking about, came the reply: "Arre, woh apna Salim Jaffer [You know, our Salim Jaffer]. He is very impressive." It was left to those present to work out that Borde surely couldn't have been referring to the former Pakistan fast bowler but Wasim Jaffer instead. Apparently Borde also referred to Ranadeb Bose as Danadeb Roy, and when corrected, came back with another of his typically matter-of-fact replies: "It's one and the same thing." Name-tags, anyone?
Getting players' names right has been a weakness for Chandu Borde in the past. So when he was appointed manager of the Indian team's tour of England, the travelling media rubbed their hands in anticipation of some classic Borde moments. They didn't have long to wait. The Times of India reported that in a team meeting before the second Test at Trent Bridge, Borde referred to a player named Salim. After a pause, when someone asked who Borde was talking about, came the reply: "Arre, woh apna Salim Jaffer [You know, our Salim Jaffer]. He is very impressive." It was left to those present to work out that Borde surely couldn't have been referring to the former Pakistan fast bowler but Wasim Jaffer instead. Apparently Borde also referred to Ranadeb Bose as Danadeb Roy, and when corrected, came back with another of his typically matter-of-fact replies: "It's one and the same thing." Name-tags, anyone?
From boot camps to virtual nets
The Australians never seem to tire of finding innovative ways to improve their standard of cricket, as if it isn't perfect enough already. On the cards now is a virtual batting studio where batsmen can shadow bat against the bowlers they will face in the middle. Cameras will be equipped to capture images of the bowlers out in the middle as seen by the batsman who is facing them. The feed will then be relayed to the dressing room. Cricket Australia's Centre of Excellence hopes to have the system in place next summer, though it's unlikely to take wing before the Sri Lankans tour. For now, Ricky Ponting and Co may have to settle for good old nets out in the open to tackle Muttiah Muralitharan rather than the virtual world.
The Australians never seem to tire of finding innovative ways to improve their standard of cricket, as if it isn't perfect enough already. On the cards now is a virtual batting studio where batsmen can shadow bat against the bowlers they will face in the middle. Cameras will be equipped to capture images of the bowlers out in the middle as seen by the batsman who is facing them. The feed will then be relayed to the dressing room. Cricket Australia's Centre of Excellence hopes to have the system in place next summer, though it's unlikely to take wing before the Sri Lankans tour. For now, Ricky Ponting and Co may have to settle for good old nets out in the open to tackle Muttiah Muralitharan rather than the virtual world.
Move over, Twenty20
Two rival teams in Chennai, the Rockers and the Sharks, going head-to-head in a street cricket tournament formed the subject of a riotous Tamil flick called Chennai 600028 that released a few months ago. To celebrate 100 days of the film's release, 32 teams across the state took part in a corporate-sponsored cricket tournament at the YMCA grounds last week. The buzz and excitement around the ground was a fitting tribute to the film, which was a big hit. The team names would certainly cause a chuckle or two - Seahorses, Criminal Boys, Men in Blue, to name a few. The winners got a cash prize and a chance to play against the team from the film.
Two rival teams in Chennai, the Rockers and the Sharks, going head-to-head in a street cricket tournament formed the subject of a riotous Tamil flick called Chennai 600028 that released a few months ago. To celebrate 100 days of the film's release, 32 teams across the state took part in a corporate-sponsored cricket tournament at the YMCA grounds last week. The buzz and excitement around the ground was a fitting tribute to the film, which was a big hit. The team names would certainly cause a chuckle or two - Seahorses, Criminal Boys, Men in Blue, to name a few. The winners got a cash prize and a chance to play against the team from the film.
Quotehanger
"Yes, I did write a letter to God before the fourth day of the Test. I wrote in it, 'Tomorrow I will win the Test match for my country. I will be the one, God please help me.' But it didn't go that way. Well, maybe I didn't write my name in the end and God thought it came from Zaheer bhai."
Sreesanth on just why things didn't go his way at Trent Bridge
"Yes, I did write a letter to God before the fourth day of the Test. I wrote in it, 'Tomorrow I will win the Test match for my country. I will be the one, God please help me.' But it didn't go that way. Well, maybe I didn't write my name in the end and God thought it came from Zaheer bhai."
Sreesanth on just why things didn't go his way at Trent Bridge
Kanishkaa Balachandran is an editorial assistant on Cricinfo